Self esteem is the way we think and feel about ourselves. We can appear outwardly confident and competent, but inside still feel as if we are aren't good enough. So, people can be in very high positions in their career, and excellent academically, yet still feel as if they are a fraud and shouldn't really be there.

Our opinion of ourselves (good or bad) is not something we are born with. It is something we develop as we go through life.

Contributing factors for low self esteem are

criticism from others (past or present) (parents, teachers, employers, partners etc.).

abuse from others (past or present) either verbal (name calling and taunting) or physical (being bullied at school, having an abusive partner, sexual abuse)

self criticism / negative self talk- telling ourselves that we are useless, bad, awful, guilty, horrible, ugly, wrong etc.

This can be linked with poor body image – hating one part (I hate my nose), or all parts, of the body (I am ugly)

Connected with low self esteem are feelings of: life being out of control, hopelessness and helplessness. Not wanting to, or being able to, take responsibility for problems – (saying things like “ I can't help it”, “I cant do anything about it”, “It will never get any better” etc.) and feeling like a failure.

This can lead to depression and being “stuck” with other problems such as eating disorders, alcohol and or drug abuse, stuck in unhealthy relationships and so on.

The good news is that just as our self esteem can be knocked down, it can be built up again.

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